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Why halo thar,
OK, so I fucked up on the whole "summer blog thingy", but I really don't like blog, I really don't.
But since I get a idea or something to say once every couple of years, I think I should share it with the community.
So the "Tory's Top Ten Things To Terrify" is back and a look on how it is up in North-Norway in the winter. Well, most snowy and cold. Really, really cold. Specially if you're in the military like me.
Here in Norway you have to join the military one way or another (unless you're a male rapist), if you're between the age of 18 and 44 you are most likely been or going to be in the military soon.
And the military just loves to be outside, all the time, in -20 celsius. WOHO!
Again, these are thing that irritates me in the winter but also things I don't want to disappear since it would be boring without them.
First on the list;
Whores. Not prostitutes, but whores: Girls who wear almost nothing and complains about the cold.
Warm clothes GET! Don't get me wrong, I love loose girls but it's just fucking irritating when half the pub are blond, dumb, short skirt wearing, beautiful legged, wet lipped, big boobed... Where was I?
On another note: It gives you an exuse to dryhump!
Next one comes tomorrow. (yeah right)
Ah, summer in Norway, a lovely thing ey? Oh, that's right.. Most of you guys don't know how Norway looks like when it's summer! Well, it's.. rainy.. atleast most of the time.
The rain keeps the mosquitoes away, the mosquitoes prevents us from going out when it's sunny, but we won't go outside when it's raining do we? And then there are the otters, OOH I don't even wanna get started with the otters!!
So I wont!
But i will complain about the little cute things that makes it worth living in north-Norway in the summer!
Tory's Top Ten Things To Terrify: (YES! I did it with only words that starts with the letter "T")
Anywhores, Top 10 things i really don't like about Norway in the summer (the list could get longer then 10 btw, i just used ten since it startes with a "T"), but things I don't wanna take away, 'cause it would be boring if they weren't there.. The same feeling you get from fillers or Matt Damon!
I will write 3 in each blog, hopefully...
Well, this will be in totally random order, so you can post what you think is the worst yourself afterwords!
the 3 first ones:
Stairs! That's right, stairs! But not the "ooh, walk me, it makes me feel good "-kind of stairs, I'm talking about EVIL stairs, the type that lets the whole mall see into the mini-skirts of the other other other other white meat! It's kind of a good thing though, but irritating since you can't have a normal conversation with a friend of yours without going "HOOO HOOO HOOO" *wiggle wiggle* every 37.8 seconds!
Even worse is this one, combined with the next one, it could have made it among the top 3 (you will understand in a few minutes!).
BABIES! Cute little babies... or are they? I'm not going to talk about those babies who cries the whole time and puke everywhere, I think that kind of babies is waaay cuter then the kind I'm about to write about!
An example, barbie meets guy, alot of "barbie does something something with guy"'s later; Barbie gives birth.
In the summer, 3 to 4 years later, barbie thinks: "Hm, wouldn't it be cute if my little girl would look like a total slut? With mini-skirt and all!" ...you get the freakin' picture! This is seriously sick, it's ok if the mother of the child wants to dress like that, but don't drag your little babie-girl down with you!
Oh the horror, oh the stairs! Where art thou elevators.
Socks, still can't find those damn socks! Sometimes it would be better if google was a real-life engine! Like "where is my damn socks?" then press "search" or "I need a beautiful gothic babe, NOW" then press "I feel lucky"!
GIVE ME RL GOOGLE, NOW!
...and; yeah, otters are still fuckin' nasty...
"Wow", it's a word that people usually say when;
1: They are referring to the game "World of Warcraft"
example: "j00 naab, u dosnt pley WoW?!1!!!eleven!"
2: Something you say when someone killed your family and then makes a dinner, fittet for a king.
3: Something I said when I looked at the new layout.
I really love it, specially this "I-gotz-me-own-site" "room", it's really great.
Only problem so far is that newgrounds won't upload my pictures... OK, it does upload it, but the damn pictures doesn't seem to come up, maybe I have to wait a couple of hours before it works like a charm?
I just can't belive that one of the internets best sites just got better.
Stay New, stay ground!